It is a problem of mass media representation, global cultural and information flows, and a lack of autonomy for people of color (including Asians) to choose how they are portrayed and for and by whom.
The other major concern which I sometimes hear for why Black American and other women may hesitate to consider Asian men as potential partners is that they fear that Asian men are bound by culture, particularly in the form of filial piety.
On the other hand, the Asian woman who is depicted as feminine due to her small frame and unassuming demeanor is at the same time presented as cunning, shrewd and domineering (as seen in the “tiger mom” stereotype for instance) and in this way may be considered masculine.
Black women, while portrayed as masculine for being tall, loud, and aggressive at the same time are depicted as super matriarchs, caring for the house and family even when faced with seemingly impossible odds.
While it may seem as though White and Black Americans are positioned on antithetical ends of an idyllic racial spectrum, I would argue that in actuality it is Asians who are presented as the polar opposites of their Black counterparts (in many respects with Asians as hypo and Black Americans as hyper ).
For instance, as a whole Asians are seen as small, quiet, and unassertive (which in a Western context are coded as feminine), whereas Black people are presented as big, loud, and physically dominant/imposing (which in turn are coded as masculine).
My dad is of mixed European ancestry and self-identifies as White, and my mom is half Puerto Rican and half Italian and identifies as multi-racial (however, she acknowledges that she can oftentimes pass for White and as such does benefit from White privilege).
Moreover, I have dated both intra- and inter-racially (with Black women among others) and was most recently in a 3 year relationship with a Black American woman (who self-identified as such).Before getting into this, I will first state that I am in no way concerned with the Black women or Asian men who genuinely do not find each other sexually attractive for whatever reason.In other words, I’m not trying to take on the job of convincing Black women to give Asian men a chance who would not want to already (or vice versa). (At the same time I do always find it peculiar when I hear people say that they “just don’t find ‘group x’ attractive.” Can’t help but think it is more complex than that but hey…that’s just me.) I think that the reason for this potential concern stems mainly from the ways in ways in which I feel we are largely represented within American media and (pop) culture.When these stereotypical archetypes are looked at more closely, it becomes easier to observe the inherent contradictions within them and to disqualify them as a result.For example, while Asian men are usually depicted as feminine due to their lack of height, penis size, or assertiveness, they are also stereotyped as capable of taking over the world (i.e.Thus while one could potentially make a case for a relationship between a Black man and an Asian woman (the ostensibly most masculine with the ostensibly most feminine), a potential relationship between an Asian man and Black woman may seem laughable if not inconceivable.